Catalog index → departmental inventory extract
Adventure Apparel Division
Prefix AA- — 12 items on file
Responsible for clothing and wearable equipment. Not responsible for what you do while wearing it.
CN-042 — Adventure Apparel
Prioritizing The Cigar Tee
For people who make poor choices.
$34.00Specification Sheet →
CN-058 — Adventure Apparel
Cheaper Than Bail Tee
Built for bad decisions.
$34.00Specification Sheet →
CN-063 — Adventure Apparel
No training required!Atomic Elbow Tee
Bear contingency. Not a good one.
$34.00Specification Sheet →
CN-071 — Adventure Apparel
Do Not Feed The Bears Tee
The sign was incomplete.
$34.00Specification Sheet →
CN-077 — Adventure Apparel
Field tested!Establish Dominance Tee
Wolf protocol. Socially expensive.
$34.00Specification Sheet →
CN-084 — Adventure Apparel
Throw Them At The Bear Tee
Citrus-based conflict resolution.
$34.00Specification Sheet →
CN-089 — Adventure Apparel
Absolutely unnecessary!Show Me The Candy Tee
Due diligence for the abducted.
$34.00Specification Sheet →
CN-107 — Adventure Apparel
Approved by no one!Bear Conversation Starter Tee
Repels nothing. Initiates everything.
$34.00Specification Sheet →
CN-112 — Adventure Apparel
No training required!Cause Problems Tee
Two kinds of men. One shirt.
$34.00Specification Sheet →
CN-118 — Adventure Apparel
Dumpster Fire Tee
Situation nominal. Ask no follow-ups.
$34.00Specification Sheet →
AA-022 — Adventure Apparel
[ product shot — adventure apparel ]1:1 Scale (Not Really)
Unmarked Coverall
No insignia. No questions. No pockets.
$84.00Specification Sheet →
AA-045 — Adventure Apparel
[ product shot — adventure apparel ]1:1 Scale (Not Really)Limited supply!
Retreat Windbreaker
Water resistant. Commitment resistant.
$62.00Specification Sheet →
Departmental note
Garments are cut to 1974 tolerances, which were generous. Sizing runs true to whoever measured it that day.
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